When we were preparing to adopt our youngest daughter, I chose Hannah Joy as her name. Joy would be her middle name. It seemed so fitting for a little girl with a radiant smile. I also loved that it would be an echo of my own name, Joyce.
I stared at photos of her in China every day before we adopted her. I couldn’t get my eyes off her smile. Though I had not met her yet, her smile spoke to me through the photographs. It spoke of a joyful defiance.
Hannah was born with a congenital heart defect and left at the gates of an orphanage at around five months old. Her birth name and exact birth date are unknown. For many months, she lived in a state-run orphanage with about 800 other children before she was moved to a medical group foster home called New Day.
With so many kids to look after, the nannies probably could not give her the attention she needed. Sadly, many children who live in orphanages stop crying because they learn that their cries go unanswered. Babies bond with their caregiver when their needs are met over and over again. They learn to trust those who hold, feed, and care for them. They learn that they are loved and that the world is a safe place for them to explore.
Despite those difficult beginnings, somehow Hannah’s spirit did not break. When we first brought her home, she would put her little hands on both my cheeks and turn my face to look at her when she spoke. She wanted to make sure I heard her every word. When my other children sat next to me, she would run over and shimmy herself in-between us. She didn’t want to share me with anyone else. She fought to bond with me!
For the first nine months after we brought Hannah home, she wanted to go with me wherever I went. If I went upstairs to fetch something, she would follow me. When I went to the bathroom, she would stick her little fingers underneath the door. As long as she was with me, Hannah felt safe and connected.
Hannah is a pre-teen now and not nearly as needy. But to this day, she still advocates for what she needs and wants: sometimes by screaming on the floor, sometimes dancing and singing at the top of her lungs. When she is sad, defiance turns her sadness into anger. Regardless of how she is feeling, she is not content to sit quietly and wait to receive whatever comes her way.
At times, we get exhausted by our spirited girl. But Hannah has a Jacob-like tenacity that is admirable. In Genesis 32:24-30, Jacob wrestled with God and wouldn’t let go until God blessed him. God ultimately rewarded Jacob because he persistently clung to what mattered. Unlike his brother Esau who carelessly gave up his birthright, Jacob cared enough to relentlessly pursue what he wanted.
When it comes to joy, may we cherish it enough to relentlessly pursue it. The pursuit of joy is actually the pursuit of God because God is the source of our joy. Joy comes from staying connected to God, from being in His presence and receiving loving attention from Him. Scriptures tell us to abide in Christ, using the metaphor of how branches must stay connected to the vine. (John 15:4-5). Like a branch that gets its nutrients from the vine, we draw life and joy from Christ, who is the true vine. To abide means to live, dwell, or remain in Christ, implying unbroken fellowship and dependence.
No matter what troubles come our way, may we keep pursuing and rejoicing in God. After all, rejoicing is a command in the Bible. We can’t always rejoice in our circumstances, but we can always rejoice in God. “Rejoice in the Lord always; and again I say rejoice.” (Philippians 4:4). “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (Thessalonians 5:16).
Obeying this commandment does not come naturally to most of us. We have to exercise our joy-muscle daily to make it stronger. This means abiding in God, the source of our joy, and giving thanks and praise to Him. Interestingly, the prefix “Re” begins the word rejoice, reminding us that we have to repeatedly choose joy again and again. It’s not a one-and-done deal; it’s an ongoing choice. Then when the challenges of life knock us over (and they will), we will have the joy muscle-memory and strength to rise up and still rejoice in the Lord.
Advent is a time when we are reminded that our joy-giver is the God-made-flesh. Jesus incarnate, who for the joy set before him, endured the crucifixion so that we could live with him both now and forever (Hebrews 12:2).
This joy Jesus secured for us was bought at a price. It went through the way of the cross to get to the other side. We also have to follow Jesus by walking in the way of the cross. Sometimes that means doing hard things and going to hard places, because we are following Jesus. God doesn’t promise us that it will be easy, but He does promise us that He is always with us and will never leave us. We can endure whatever hardship we face because we know Jesus has come into the world and overcome death for us.
Joy looks back at the first Advent at the birth of Jesus and what He accomplished on the cross. Joy also looks forward to the second Advent, when Jesus will return to make all things right. And joy can be experienced in the middle of whatever darkness we are going through, because He has poured out His Holy Spirit into our hearts, giving us joy right now.
What Hannah has taught me, is that we must keep getting back up and keep seeking joy. No night is so dark that His light cannot reach it. “Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” Psalms 100:1-2 (NIV)
Joyce Koo Dalrymple is co-founder of Khora Collective and serves as Chief of Content and Engagement. Additionally, she is a spiritual director, Bible teacher, retreat speaker, and hosts the podcast called Adopting Hope. She is the author of several books including Parables of Grace and co-author of Redeeming Eden. She previously served as a television journalist and attorney. Joyce holds a JD from Boston College and MDiv from Metro Atlanta Seminary. She and her husband, Tim, live in Philadelphia and have 3 children.
